One of my big goals as a wife and mommy this year, is to build some margin into my family’s life. Owning a business has its perks, but as anyone who is a business owner can tell you, it can be very taxing on the family. This year I want to ease the stress of “work overload” by simplifying and choosing the best over the good for my family.
The word that best describes my goals, is margin. You know what margin is, right? By definition margin is: “The blank border on each side of the print on a page.”
So imagine you’re reading a book, and the words run all the way to the edge of the page, and there are no spaces between paragraphs. Everything runs from edge to edge, top to bottom, not leaving a bit of white space anywhere. Ugh! right?
There’s a reason that there are margins in the pages of a book. It is much more pleasant to our eyes, and easier to read if there is some blank space to break things up.
So here are my plans for building margin into 3 areas of my life.
1 Margin in the home.
Look at this bookshelf! (taken from the Pottery Barn website) Doesn’t it make you smile? It’s not packed with books from side to side, with some extras stacked on top. No, it’s not, but my bookshelves are like that. Packed to the very fullest. Once again, ugh!
Even though I followed the KonMari system through about 80% of my house a few months ago. I never quite finished, and the bathroom cupboards are driving me nuts! So I’m going to complete the areas I skipped, then go back and freshen up the areas that have already been done. Ladies, I got rid of a lot of stuff, but I live in a 750 sq. foot apartment with a hubby and 3 littles, so things do stack up again over time. I’ll be packing up more bags and boxes, and following my own advice from {this post} all over again.
- Get rid of unnecessary stuff.
- Resist the urge to fill the empty space created by decluttering. Space gives us peaceful, happy feelings.
- Identify “stash spots” and “clutter traps” and eliminate them.
- Don’t underestimate having extra space in cupboards. “Nobody sees it,” you think. But YOU see it, and this is about what sets us at ease in our own home.
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2 Margin on the calendar.
I’ll admit that this one comes a little easier for me than for some, simply because I like being at home. However, if you’re the type that tends to have every last square filled with something, maybe these tips will help you put some white space back into your calendar…
- Say “no” to one thing every week.
- Choose a certain day (or two) of the week that you do not schedule anything. Pretend those days are not there, and place your activities on the other days.
- Stack your activities into the same day. Ex: Playdate in the morning, afternoon grocery shopping, dinner with friends in the evening. The next day, leave open so you get a break.
- If you love having people over, create a list of friends you want to have over soon, then work them into the activity days. (I stole this idea from my younger sister. She is a hostess extraordinaire, and has a handy list of “friends to have over” to keep things organized.)
- If you are a workaholic, choose a couple nights where you close the books, laptops, and files early and enjoy family time or a movie instead. Don’t feel guilty for relaxing, it is good for your brain and your health! It is proven that working long hours makes you less productive, not more productive!
3 Margin in your everyday life.
I’m reading “Grace not Perfection” – by Emily Ley right now. (Book review coming soon!) Toward the beginning of the book, she shares the things she loves, and encourages you to write down yours. Here are mine. Things I love…
Relaxed evenings with Rick, Visits to Mom’s house, Playing the violin, Quiet time to read & reflect, Warm coffee with a piece of dark chocolate, One-on-one conversations with close friends, Teaching my kids, Prayer, Fresh berries, Traveling, Squeezie hugs from the kids, Photography, Painting/drawing, Reading to my kids, Back rubs, Fresh flowers in the house, Rocking my babies to sleep.
Then the author asks you to think about how filling up every space in your life, eliminates time to enjoy these things you love the most. This has been on my mind ever since I read it. Instead of just doing good things, or ok things, I want to fill my life with as many of the items from my list as I can. I want to read to my children, not read Facebook…I want to meet for coffee with a friend, not go to large get togethers…. I want to end my daily routine a little ealier in order to have extra time at night for reading…
The author suggests, “Wake up 20 minutes early to savor your favorite dark roast coffee with hazelnut creamer!” Well, when you put it that way, waking up a little earlier doesn’t sound so bad. 🙂 But really, something this small can add joy to your life, and get your day started right.
Leave margin in your everyday life, and fill the little moments with things that make you feel deeply alive.
On my reading list for the next few months are multiple books on the subject of simplifying, living life instead of rushing through it, enjoying the little things, etc. Reading on this topic is like breathing a breath of fresh air. Has busyness become a badge of honor for you? It’s easy to get there in the rush of trying to keep up and be enough, but you don’t have to buy into that. You can live a fulfilling, high achieving life, while still taking the time to rest and spend meaningful time with your family.
Will we ever be perfectly balanced? Probably not. Will we ever have it all together? Definitely not. But being intentional about our time, and where it’s going, can make a beautiful difference in our health and the happiness of our families.
Kaity says
January 9, 2017 at 9:29 pmWell put. In this hectic world we live in, I think most ladies can relate to needing a little more “margin” in our lives. Love you!